Death Is Not The Enemy

 Every eulogy for a young person who dies always has something rhyming with gone too soon.

It is odd that we all feel there is such a thing as dying early, which sort of narcissist person believes he has all the control at his tips to live to an age to which he determines fit for death. Or determine the suitable time for his loved ones passing.

Sensible people have plans for their lives concerning the future, many of them are wise enough to take the necessary steps to see those plans come to be.

Wiser still are the ones who take risks and never stop swinging at being happy or fulfilled.

The wisest are the ones who do so knowing that death is by the way side or have in the back of their minds that the possible worse that could happen can happen.

It is silly to think all your plans for yourself or your children will go according to the way you have written them. Your child may die on their way to school or suffer an illness that will make living unbearable. Or all that could happen to you, when it does I ask, is this not life?

Whichever comes first be it disappointment or death know this – you are not too big for life to throw you a curve ball. Don’t waste the rest of your time pitying yourself or feeling down, life may not be done with you yet.


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Guilty by Association

In this here article tribalism, sects or groups mean the same thing.
I welcome corrections and criticism

We form a bias on people based on their views and we do this by grouping them along with anyone we know share such views.
In a study published in a book in February 2018, Political Tribes, by Yale Law School’s Amy Chua, humans are hardwired for tribalism. If this is so, even thinking or attempting not to be tribal is an uphill battle.
When you are in the out in a society of common thinking, tribalism affects you. You will be battling with people trying to stop them from placing you into groups and embrace the liberalism that comes with this present-day modernization.
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I was called, tainted by the devil by a close friend because of my religious view. I was called confused because my view of God doesn't place me here or there in people's understanding of what "Atheism" or "Agnosticism" is. Being an individual with a view is now classified as confusion or pretense of a deep longing to eat your cake and have it. People believe you want to be part of a group and not obey the rules of that group.
So, before you open your mouth, some people have already classified and grouped you because of the view of "…that is how people like that think." "This is the way people who look like this think..."
The funny one for me is when a black man from my community says "…you cannot understand because you do not know the experience people like us face." These views will continue to isolate us from reaching a common ground of individualism.

In Africa where I am, we try to fight tribalism and keep some parts of it by saying, you do not throw the dirty water with the baby. Failing to see that the said baby itself (which is culture) is the problem. Since we will not disown or address or cultural bias, the baby has wondered off leaving stains of muddy water everywhere. As a community we stand there holding a big bowl of water filled with the dirt of tribalism and group appropriations.
An example of the baby causing more damage than good is the whole anti-LGBT movement and trying to enforce religious rules. First, this has not made us more forward thinking or advanced than the west. Second, it is causing the best of us to leave the continent and seek life elsewhere. Majority of the people who seek asylum elsewhere after leaving Africa sight LGBT or religious issues.
I have heard people say the seekers are just looking for greener pastures and are lying that these issues affect them. I in turn reply to them, "but these issues do exist and the only way they can be lying is if these issues don't exist."

The bias in our views is so rampant that when I say to people in my community, “I see nothing wrong with someone being gay, trans or any other sexual orientation they choose. They should be allowed to live free, get married and try to be happy.”
Most people ask me, “what church do you go to?”
This is odd for me because my community has as much Muslims as they are Christians, but I have never been asked... "are you a Muslim?"
Neither religion in my community accepts LGBT into their congregation. Regardless, people believe you must be of the less rigid Christian folks.
When I reply, "I do not believe in God."
They give out this, "oh!" and try to make me see how the devil has won my heart and how the west has corrupted my view.
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All the "this is how we do things..." "we do not say things like this..." must end. All it has done is to further divide people into more groups than there should be.
This is a world problem and not just Africa and we must realize that all these groupings be it sexual, political or race will never make things better. In Africa where it is more pronounce, we must admit and stop lying to ourselves that we are better than the west in somethings. It does not add up, when those things are the same reason your economy and standard of living has left you grouped in the third world category.

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Does Your Opinion Really Matter?

Being offended by someone’s view is the new trend.

Constructive arguments are boiled down to feelings which places fact and truth locked away in isolation.


Nobody cares to make sense anymore all they care about is, “my opinion matters.” No matter how ridiculous that opinion is or their inability to give that opinion life, they still think it matters.

Everyone is truly entitled to an opinion, but that entitlement should be rendered invalid the moment you cannot give that opinion a foundation to stand on its own.


I do not have to agree with you because you feel you are right. I do not have to agree with you because some authority you admire says you are right. Numbers (i.e. amount of people) do not add up to accuracy, fact and properly stating you point does. You cannot claim you are right because you have the numbers.

Having a great amount of number of people believing in what you say or sharing the same collective reason does not mean anything in a conversation if you can’t explain/defend that view, without getting emotional.


We need to be open minded and not allow our feelings direct our opinions. We also need to read and investigate things for ourselves – make room in our minds that what we know may be wrong, and the only way we can know the truth is by investigating without getting emotional.




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Crossover

I'm standing and looking, it is December thirty and one
Almost the time to crossover to a new year of merry and rum
But still I see many marching down in pennies
All dressed up for the go, one last time for them to know

That God cares

He sits alone in heaven and missing their praises
He can't wait to welcome all and forgive their faces
They all seem so glee, believing today is the day
Of Wonder and miracle to wipe all their pain

It is almost eleven-thirty and I see many praying
casting and binding, jumping while praising
I sit and wonder why they are all so glee
Giddy and happy about this miserable three

If he didn't ease your pain the last 364
What makes today so different from his daily rapport?
Close your eyes and pray, but waiting over the hour
Are all your debts, saddened missed chances and old Mrs. Prowler

Why bother, if he is there today should not matter
Why not stay home and enjoy a cold shower?
I for one will be wanking into the year
Listening to Tim Minchin blazing ear to ear

A reboot of Christopher Hitchens and Dawkins will be read
While y'all be gucking and singing with cheers
The only sad thing about my New Year crossover with chores
Is that you are with friends and I wish I was with whores

Before you ask why am not with the whores
Look to your left, they are holding your hand in chorus




Note:
Whore here means PROSTITUTE.

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Never Feel Sorry For Trying To Live

There's this psychology that we are bound (unless by stroke of luck) to make the same mistakes in love and living like our parents showed to us.

Such truth scares me and for that reason I ask of you, look to the path before you and compare it to the path behind - to make sure you do not fall into a vicious cycle.

This sad truth falls into the poor parents are more likely to bore poor sons. Or, the love or life we chase is sometimes similar to the one we were shown and are used to growing up.

The time has come for us to take chances, reach out to fortunes we desire and never be sorry for every time you tried to improve our life and failed.

Instead, let failure be a reminder of the path behind and let the fire in the desire to be free from the path behind be to itself a fuel.

When the old talk, listen for learning not for complete emulation because how can someone who finds vision at 70 be your guide?

The only guide they have for you is, "don't wait until you are 70 to have a vision for your life."

We are told the old have wisdom on the path to follow, I dare say, they have wisdom on paths not to follow.

Wise ones, advise you based on experience of how they wasted their living being safe and not being eventful.

Foolish ones say, "look at me, don't you want to be me." I dare answer, "No, I want to discover the best thing I can be."

You can never be too old to start living, but at least never let it be said about you that, “when he was graven and old, he discovered his foolishness and became wise.”





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Why Read?

We have been fooled to believe age is directly proportional to wisdom
The aged wanting to hold on to their prestige show off virtues they lack
They do so hoping we believe age = wisdom
Wise is the man who teaches others, but learns more from his pupils

Books are always fresh, reading is the way to truly get wise
Being wise is always changing your mind when a better understanding comes to light
Foolishness is being upset when someone calls you unstable because you changed your mind
Find new books to update yourself, don’t claim to be wise on yesterday’s fact which is now today’s fiction

Never make light of statistics, they may be sad truths, but they are true
Some people always break away from the statistical truth – that is a given
Although it happens it doesn’t mean the whole study is false
No book can accurately predict anything to a 100%, any book that claims such is full of junk

Experience not age is the best teacher
If you agree to that you will also agree that you cannot experience everything there is in life
I cannot know all there is to know on being a Doctor, Lawyer and Astro-physicist in one lifetime
So, I read books on these and do research to be sure it is not junk, but a fact leading to a theory

Foolish is anyone who challenges a fact or theory because he claims the teacher didn’t experience it
As long as the foolish one cannot bring to light any other contrary evidence, he remains a fool
If anyone challenges your fact saying, “did you see it yourself, don’t believe everything you read.”
Stop the conversation there, what point is there arguing with one who believes he must experience all to believe it is true

There is a difference between fact/theory and faith
Same way there is a difference between a person's idea and philosophy
There is also a difference between fiction and true story
Never mix them up

Self-validation is no validation
A book that reference itself was written by a fool
References are needed so that you can further read more to fully grasp the writer
We will never hire a person whose references are, “me, myself and I”

The more you study the more cautious you are when addressing others
You will feel wiser when around someone who speaks with ignorance
You will be prompted to correct their ignorance and shed light
But a word of caution, you too are ignorant of many things it just so happens not of the person’s subject matter



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What I Believe

Nothing is set or cast in stone, we are the authors of our tomorrow.

We have the right to choose and to change our minds, we don't have to explain ourselves to you. Either you accept us for who we are or piss off.

I believe life evolved, scientific theories & facts too evolve.

You cannot be a hundred percent certain of anything. Also, if you are a one or a seven on the "Dawkins Belief Scale" then you are a liar.

We are all gifted in different ways, it will be nice if we are told which way we seem to stand taller than most because sometimes we do not know.

I most times do not care what you think on some matters, the same way I believe you care not what I think too.

Picking and choosing what I like is what religion is about.

 

Sex is for both parties to enjoy so discussing what you both like is paramount, but not as paramount to you trying them to please one another.

Whoever I choose to have sex with is my business not yours.

I believe before anyone gets married they should live together, very important.

When a relationship ends you are just at fault as the other party. Pride hides this from you.

Friends always see what you did wrong in your last relationship, but they do not want to be burdened to tell you.

You will always miss the one that got away, but that is because you are focused on the good times. Your brain is not programmed to recall the pain and sadness you felt when you were facing the trials.

I do not see anything wrong with any gender making the first move. If the receiver is not matured enough to handle that, then they are not for you.

When you meet someone you like or want to be with, do not let outside rules like age, gender, tribe, race, religion or social status be a factor. That miserable “OK PERSON” could be your happily today, biggest regret tomorrow, murderous intent the day after and the arms you call home that you never want to be without.
 
If outside rules do matter to you, then make sure your partner also accepts those rules.
 
Core values are more important to me like, parenting, spending & saving culture, ideological views, cleanliness, time-consciousness, sexual view, understanding viewpoints, communication skills, great arguer and ability to be absent when present.

There is no right person for anyone, everyone can be the right person and that is the truth.



What makes a great arguer:

• Someone who sticks to fact not feelings and is ready to accept fault when they lose on the subject matter.
• One who does not get angry and insult while talking.
• One who knows that disagreement on anything does not affect or should affect how we converse on other things.

 

If you constantly complain about your colleague’s inability to be useful to you, then you are a useless leader.

If you complain that you must do everything yourself for it to be perfect because of the above, then you are a useless teacher.

If you think you work harder than your colleagues or subordinates then you do not, you seem to have enough time on your hands to be measuring how others work.

 

Saving for the future you may never have is the best thing ever, save - you will need it for the future you never wanted.

Always live below your means, if this makes you feel bad because you don’t – then I feel worse for you.

In everything give your best, except when your best gets criticized then you don't stress.

You will always meet those people who always think they are ahead because they are smarter, do not let that get you down.

Luck is what rules the world, some have it and some don't, it is life, get over it. 

Money will change you, it is because we do not have it that we are all so humble.

Ever met those guys that talk too much and know nothing?

When someone must shout to make his point even though the point is out of this world foolish – allow him because the more you do not interrupt, the faster you will be saved from his foolish words.

 

You cannot always be yourself, don’t fool yourself that you can.

You can, when needed, stand for what you believe, don’t let anyone or yourself fool you that you can’t.

Being quiet about what you believe in the face of danger or in front of a loud mouth is not cowardice, but wisdom.



Assisted death and abortion should be an accepted thing.

When I die my body will be placed in the ground to rot. The soil will benefit from this and so will the world.

I'm not worried about what people will think of me when I'm dead, the reason is plain and simple, I'm dead... dead men don't worry.

My head houses the brain which houses me. When I die and the brain dies, the me is gone. There is no soul or spirit that is going anywhere to be judged for anything, death is the end.

For the above two reasons, there is much to live for and I will live the best way I can.

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Things I Don't Mind

I don't mind if you gather every Sunday and allow demons to be beaten out of you until you pass out, next time please record it on your phone I will love a laugh.

I don't mind if you starve yourself of food for hours or days, you should lose weight anyways a third of the world population is obese.

I don't mind if you bow with your heads to the ground five times a day. You are damned if you do and damned if you don't, so bow away.

I don't mind if you get married or not, but marrying a nine-year-old or a child not above eighteen is pedophilia.

I don't mind if you starve yourself of sex, just don’t expect me to.

I don't mind if you find the other sex attractive, I'm attracted to people of my gender… it shouldn’t bother you I’m leaving more for you to have your pick.

I don't mind if you are proud of your sex at birth, I'm proud to be me too and I prouder to be trans.

I don't mind if you give all your money to another because you think he is holy, I rather spend my money on myself thank you.

I don't mind if you deny yourself sleep to talk to yourself all night. I used to do that too, way back when my imaginary friend visits, now I will rather sleep.

I don't mind if you sing to your Lord all day, just as long as you do not mind me joining you.

I don't mind if you sing all night, just do it quietly there is no point keeping me up with you.

I don't mind if you become picky of food. I too can be picky, but not because of sin I just think seafood are yucky.

I don't mind if you become picky of whom you will call priest. I do not blame you based on the amount of molestation going on, I too will be picky.

I don't mind if you condemn another sect of yourself because you feel holier. Hey! your religion your rules.

I don't mind if you believe you are holier than me as a matter of fact I applaud you.

I don't mind that you think I'm going to your hell. Note, for me God and the Devil are the same. They are two friends chilling in the 100 acre woods with Pooh, Piglet, Tigger, Kanga and Roo.

I don't mind that you deny the wisdom of science from many books to believe in one book, just don't say things like "it is just a theory" it is clear you do not know what theory means.



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They're The Same, Not Me

Freedom is alienating
And reasoning is not becoming
In my world confirming is key

Every light and every sound
Plays the same in every town
And everyone thinks the problem is me

You can tell when they speak
The very next line to proceed
Because everyone is reading the same books

Books of culture and despair
A tomorrow with all gone
With today amounting to nothing

They look ahead to the dawn
Sell their lives to the dream
That one day it will be better when they meet

While I’m left in despair
A lonely man with no care
Whose today is all the tomorrow he will ever need


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To Be Happy

Imagine waking up to a new reality
A reality where everything you believed in was a lie
All your sacrifices and hopes were errors on the path of living

Imagine finding out that evil is all there is
And there is no twist ending to life
Every joy you denied self was for nothing and morality is what you make it

Imagine you are let in on a secret
That what you need to be happier is a change of view
Would you deny the change needed to be happy or go for it?

Imagine discovering the above now
Will you throw away what you once believed?
Or deny the facts and still stay glued to what was, holding on to misery that was



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Battle To Save My Love

Dear eyes,
It is time to ride to save our love
We will lose many friends along the way and turn many to foes
They will misunderstand and call us evil
Our brothers will stand strong, but not beside us

Dear mouth be ready for blasphemy
We will curse and tear down all they hold dear
We will begin confusion in their midst and say stories that are unsound
To set them running on different sides

The day has begun and the battle to free our love is here
There they are afar bleeding, oh dear love we will be there soon
Hold on my love, we forsake you no more
Welcome home, we will no longer wage war within ourselves

My love you are so thin
They have starved you of wisdom and called reality a dream
Today I say to you, only the heavens are above us
No more tears my love, dear heart you are home



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Those with Ph.D. in Normal

Where did the idea that it is wrong to change your view/perception of life come from?

I find myself in conversations with people who seem to have a Ph.D. in what is normal and natural.

When you hit the door of reasoning of what is normal to you may not be to another, they try to break the tie by using nature.

You explain that nature is not govern by human laws and precepts, thereby not making nature the best tie breaker for human reason. They pull out morality/religion.

A punishment factor comes in when you change your view in some religion and some religion criticizes what others accept as their way of life.

At this point you are explaining to them it is prejudice to discard someone’s way of life as abnormal and wrong because they do not agree with your concept of religion or morality.

The moment you cannot make anyone see the stupidity and prejudice in judging another person’s sexuality, religion, race or choice because they do not agree with yours, you are stuck.

They then call you a prejudice also for kicking against them for not being open.

And you wonder, does that make me a prejudice of the stupid or does calling them stupid make me prejudice?

There is no person, religion or view who owns the sole right to what is normal and what is not because you cannot relate with something or someone does not make it/they abnormal and wrong.

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Goodbye friends

I’m dealing with something sad and it is how to say goodbye to my friends.

The ones similar in the way I talk and the way I want them to hear me.

They are the ones I call when I need to express myself.

They listen not like judges, but as students wanting to understand your moment.

When around them, I get this elevation and freedom to speak on anything and everything.

We engage in communication intercourse giving and receiving pleasure as we change our minds with words of reason and shine light to the dark places of stupidity.

How do I say goodbye to the most interesting people on earth?

Who careless where you stand, but their interest is why you stand there.

They may not make the best lovers, but each one night stand of dialogue leaves a lifetime imprint.

Then they are the friends I will not miss.

The ones that fear I will take on the robe of a judge as they do when I undress my thoughts.

They build walls between their thoughts and voice, to filter the informative bits of themselves and will sum up the sight of a beautiful lady as, “beautiful.”

Failing to recognise her curves or the way her presence makes the sun shine brighter and her voice, tingles in the air like you are in heaven listening to the angels singing.

They do not know themselves as much as my friends and I know who we are.

Goodbye my friends and have a safe flight.

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If I'm Bisexual, What is Wrong With That?

I met a lady who was interested in discussing sexuality and was acceptable of someone being gay (which is a big deal here in Africa). It is hard to find people like that, but the flip side was she was not acceptable to why someone will be bisexual. For her being bisexual is being greedy and wanting the best of both worlds.

The conversation changed from sexuality to grouping people based on your idea, drawing a line and saying people on this side are this and those on the other side are that.

Life draws no lines, and it is impossible to group certain sect of people into known groups. The LGBTQ community has the “Q” (Queer/Questioning) as an umbrella term to cover those who are unsure or would rather not be grouped or tagged by a sexual orientation.

Being intellects does not give us the right to dictate to others who they are and where they fit. We are more than just pieces of a puzzle because a puzzle has a certain goal where every piece must be in the right spot to get to that goal. But in life, every piece has its own goal, and it doesn't need every single member of the home race or every member of its group sect to make itself a masterpiece.

We need to be open-minded to the world and the different possibilities that are out there.

I for one accept, “I'm not set on anything, I know nothing about anything and what I do know are ideas which are subject to criticism and change.”

We have to be open-minded to everything and never concluding on a matter without evidence, just because you think it is so, does not make it so.

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Missing The Idea of God

I no longer believe in God, but sometimes I miss it.

I do not know for other atheist, but for me walking away from God and religious believes after years of dedication did not result in a sigh of relief or a freedom party. Walking away from God and anything religion was a sad, depressing and lonely day.

I never felt so alone and people take turns guessing why I walked away from God and ninety-nine percent of the time they are right. It was disappointment and realization that believing in God is like believing in Santa Claus.

This happened when years of disappointment caught up with logic and reason forming a new perception of my reality.

I cannot undo knowing if I jump up I cannot fly, same way I cannot undo knowing there is no God. I came to understand that your religious believe is almost one hundred percent based on your geographical location.

Someone once asked me, “if anyone proves God exist, will you believe?”

I replied, “Yes.”

The person was shocked and said, “that means deep inside you have not stopped believing in him.”

To that I replied, “I have stopped, but if there is proof I will not fight against it because I’m not stupid!”

At present, I do not think on God because I have accepted my present perception or awareness of him not existing and the anger of being a fool for so long makes me want to pass the knowledge across.

Then there are the days when I’m talking to someone and the bible comes up and we get talking back and forth if God exist or not. I look at the person and I see this cuteness in what I believe is their ignorance, what I see is a child telling me how Santa will bring presents this Christmas and how the lovely fairies will come party in their room.

The same way when a child talks and I’m amazed by their innocence making me wish I was a child again is how I feel when someone goes on talking about the utopia in God. I look at them with a kind eye with a smile remembering the days I too used to believe in Santa and fairies.


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